
We thrive on euphemism.  We call multi-megaton bombs "Peace-keepers", closet
size apartments "efficient" and incomprehensible artworks "innovative".  In
fact, "euphemism" has become a euphemism for "bald-faced lie".  And now, here
are the euphemisms so colorfully employed in Personal Ads:

EUPHEMISM			REALITY
-------------------		-------------------------
Excited about life's journey	No concept of reality
Spiritually evolved		Oversensitive
Moody				Manic-depressive
Soulful				Quiet manic-depressive
Poet				Boring manic-depressive
Sultry/Sensual			Easy
Uninhibited			Lacking basic social skills
Unaffected and earthy		Slob and lacking basic social skills
Irreverent			Nasty and lacking basic social skills
Very human			Quasimodo's best friend
Swarthy				Sweaty even when cold or standing still
Spontaneous/Eclectic		Scatterbrained
Flexible			Desperate
Aging child			Self-centered adult
Youthful			Over 40 and trying to deny it
Good sense of humor		Watches a lot of television
