
						PLAYGIRL, Inc.
						Philadelphia, Pa.  19369

Dear Sir:
	Your name has been submitted to us with your photo.  I regret to
inform you that we will be unable to use your body in our centerfold.  On
a scale of one to ten, your body was rated a minus two by a panel of women
ranging in age from 60 to 75 years.  We tried to assemble a panel in the
age bracket of 25 to 35 years, but we could not get them to stop laughing
long enough to reach a decision.  Should the taste of the American woman
ever change so drastically that bodies such as yours would be appropriate
in our magazine, you will be notified by this office.  Please, don't call
us.
	Sympathetically,
	Amanda L. Smith

p.s.	We also want to commend you for your unusual pose.  Were you
	wounded in the war, or do you ride your bike a lot?
